Final night time, my cellphone began buzzing. “Activate the TV!” stated my uncle. “Did we find out about this?!!” requested my sister-in-law Emily. “Tonight’s Jeopardy!” wrote CoJ contributor Kelly Dawson, together with a photograph she snapped in her lounge:
On the display screen, the Jeopardy immediate was, “Dying of lung most cancers, Paul Kalanithi tried to reply what makes life value dwelling in ‘When Breath Turns into’ this.”
After all, I instantly referred to as my sister, Lucy. Lengthy-time readers will know that she and Paul had been married for eight years earlier than he died in 2015. She helped shepherd his memoir — When Breath Becomes Air — to publication the next 12 months.
On the cellphone, Lucy and I first laughed concerning the recreation present itself. Are you able to think about if somebody requested the query, “What’s air?” And also you answered, “Dying of lung most cancers, Paul Kalanithi tried to reply what makes life value dwelling in ‘When Breath Becomes’ this.” A really wild reply, haha.
However my sister was touched and pleased that Paul’s memoir remains to be a part of the cultural dialog. “One of many issues that basically shocked me after Paul died was that he really died,” she stated in a current Big Salad issue (present hyperlink). “He’d had late-stage most cancers for 2 years, and I even knew he was going to die that very day, however when somebody really dies, they simply disappear. They simply vanish. It felt so stunning to me.”
We at all times go to Paul’s grave after we go to San Francisco, and Lucy and her daughter go frequently with family and friends, particularly on days like New 12 months’s Eve or Paul’s birthday. “Generally I am going alone, particularly after I don’t really feel like myself,” she told me. “I’ll lie on him, after which I’ll really feel higher. On our marriage ceremony anniversary, I’ll convey him a lemon from our lemon tree.”
Did you see the Jeopardy episode yesterday? And are you lacking anybody at the moment? xoxo
P.S. How to write a condolence note, and what do you think happens when you die?
(Due to Kelly Dawson for the real-time photograph!)